Choosing a New Normal

Written by Jeremy Hawkins

It’s All Good!

Lynnie and I had the opportunity to hold a Zoom interview last week with Paula Cooper, a friend and local Social Studies teacher. The text thread shared minutes before our Zoom interview represents Paula well and is a fitting way to start this post. Lynnie told us she was running behind, getting dinner on the table, and needed a few more minutes.  Paula and I told her to take her time.  A minute later Lynnie asked for a little more time.  Paula was quick to reassure her that she did not need to rush.  And I quote, “Seriously, take your time. Eat with your family! Breathe for a minute. It’s all good!”  That’s Paula for you.  She is not one to ‘sweat the small things’. Instead, stays open to choosing a new normal as needed while keeping her focus on what matters most.

A Story of Faith & Hope

Paula Cooper is a lifelong Denver Broncos fan, an online Social Studies teacher of 6th—9th graders, a mother of two and grandmother of three, is married to her “rock,” and is actively battling cancer. Her story is one of faith and hope.

Paula described her childhood as difficult.  Although she didn’t elaborate, she told us that she learned to cope and manage while continuing to move forward.  Life as an adult has been a bit of the same. She has faced many challenges but has always pushed forward.  Through divine guidance and the help of friends and family, she was able to bounce back from a difficult divorce, finish school, and become a teacher.   More divine guidance connected her with her husband Randy, the individual she describes as her “rock” whom she couldn’t imagine facing life without. Paula is where she is today because of her perseverance and positive outlook.

Multiple Myeloma

In August of 2020, Paula was diagnosed with multiple myeloma¹, a blood cancer that affects the plasma cells. This diagnosis was shocking and devastating, as there is currently, no cure for this disease. To make matters worse, Paula has a high-risk form of myeloma, meaning it is typically quick to relapse and difficult to get under control.  Amazingly, she has beaten the odds repeatedly since her diagnosis.   

Paula’s treatment plan is a rough one. Every other week she gets lab work done on Wednesday and has treatments on Thursday and Friday.  She is sick and feels wiped out on Saturday and Sunday but usually returns to “normal” by Tuesday.  Twenty-one days of the month she takes oral chemo.  And she will do all of this for the rest of her life. To many of us, this treatment plan would seem daunting, and for good reason. Paula, though, recognizes that many people do not have treatment options and is just grateful that she does. 

The Bothers

It’s not hard to see the bothers in Paula’s life.  There are many, and it would be easy for her to focus on them. She purposely chooses not to. Although she does have bad days, she tries her best to choose to accept her new normal and to find joy in her journey.  Paula told us that most days really are okay, even though she gets fatigued easily. She is still able to do things she enjoys like hiking, being with Randy as he hunts, and fishing.  She is also able to spend time with her children and grandchildren who live locally and she visits the ones who live in North Carolina, even though she’s susceptible to anything contagious and takes a risk in doing so. She has learned to find the blessings amongst the bothers and is happy and enjoying life because of it.

The Blessings

As an educator, I loved one particular part of Paula’s story.  It’s one example of her finding the blessings among the bothers. She told us that shortly before her diagnosis things just seemed off at work.  At the time she was working as a middle school librarian.  After a disagreement with her supervisor, she felt a shove to apply to teach online.  She was hired for that job within minutes, which is rare. The timing was everything for her as she received her cancer diagnosis just two weeks later. 

The online nature of Paula’s job has made working through cancer possible.  Further, teaching online has provided her with “cool opportunities” to work with learners in a way that she loves.  Her school is a non-traditional one, so she has been able to help students find success who have otherwise struggled in a traditional school setting.  It isn’t an easy job, but Paula has excelled and found a passion for educating in this way.  

Thoughts To Live By

I could go on but will finish with a few things Paula said, not in any particular order or even direct quotes, but additional examples of blessings vs. bothers:

• There is a fine line between faith and fear – choose faith, it makes life better
• A diagnosis like this doesn’t have to be the end of your life – you can take the next step
• Always choose hope
• Every day is a gift – don’t waste any of them
• We all should be facing our mortality with the same urgency as a cancer patient – be where Heavenly Father wants you to be before you are called home

Learning more about Paula’s story and her outlook on life has inspired me and Lynnie to appreciate the small things in life and to live with purpose. Has it done the same for you?  We’d love to hear your thoughts and reactions in the comments below!      

References

1. Multiple myeloma.  Mayo Clinic. Accessed Nov. 6, 2024.  https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/multiple-myeloma/symptoms-causes/syc-20353378#:~:text=Overview,build%20up%20in%20bone%20marrow. ↩︎